‘Faith was the only thing that kept us from choosing a termination’

NHS maternity services are currently facing intense scrutiny, with the government ordering “a rapid national investigation” earlier this year. When Baroness Amos releases her report, it is expected to reveal failures across the 14 trusts under investigation. Baby loss charities Sands and Tommy’s have already stated improved maternity care would have prevented the deaths of more than 800 babies in 2022-23. 

It is also thought that hundreds of recommendations to abort foetuses with suspected health challenges have been made without sufficient reviews. That’s Beth Appleby’s story. 

In October 2021, Beth and her husband were incorrectly informed that their unborn child was “incompatible with life”. They chose to go ahead with the pregnancy and Beth gave birth to their third child in February 2022 against every piece of medical advice. 

In her book Carrying Hope, Beth gives a heartfelt account of pregnancy, vulnerability and faith. She describes her medical journey as “lacking in empathy or compassion”, saying that she was made to feel like the child she carried was an inconvenience rather than a precious human life.

Hope weighed less than four pounds at birth, but her loud cry told the world she had a voice

Mum on a mission

Born in South Wales to missionary parents, Beth accepted Christ as a child, was baptised and later helped lead the Christian Union at the University of York. 

“I always wanted to become a missionary,” she recalls, accepting a five-year posting to North Africa to run prayer, education and English language projects after a charity gap year. 

Moving back to Surrey to be involved with the 24/7 prayer movement, Beth married, became a mother of two and discovered a new calling. “I’d been through testing times, but my faith hadn’t deepened yet,” Beth admits, recalling the loss of identity that came with full-time motherhood. “Keeping a household running with no thanks or celebration was tough. I was completely out of my depth – and needed God as much as any missionary.”

But despite the challenges and chaos of parenthood, the Applebys decided to try for their third child as the country came out of lockdown. During the pregnancy, as with her first two children, Beth had intense morning sickness. During that time, she was impacted by a well-known verse from Hebrews. “It was Easter time, and I was struck by the phrase: ‘For the joy…set before him [Jesus] endured the cross’ [12:2],” Beth says. “I had suffered with both my pregnancies but had no idea what I was going to experience the third time around.”

The vitality of hope

Beth felt her unborn child move at 14 weeks. “The kicks were so vigorous and regular – I could feel this baby’s vitality. It was completely incongruous with the phrase medical professionals used at our 20-week scan. ‘Incompatible with life’, they called it. It gave us no sense of hope whatsoever.”

Consultant after consultant said that choosing an abortion would be the kindest thing to do for a foetus diagnosed with Edwards’ syndrome (also known as Trisomy 18). This rare genetic disorder is life-limiting, with most babies suffering acute health challenges including heart, kidney, breathing and digestion problems. 

With little knowledge of the condition, Beth anxiously searched the internet for wisdom. She was shocked and, even with her GP husband at her side, they felt the weight of the ‘expert’ opinion they had been given pressing heavily on them.

The deep mystery of life

While grappling for answers, praying for wisdom and searching for hope, the Applebys’ faith was tested like never before. “It really gave me compassion for women who face an impossible situation – and they could be single, vulnerable and alone,” Beth says. “Pregnancy is such a mystery – and I am convinced now more than ever that no one truly understands it, not the most experienmatced medical professionals – not anyone. Only God knows what is going on inside the womb.” 

It was God who sustained Beth and her family during what became a gruelling four months. Clinging to scriptures from the Psalms, Beth and her husband chose to continue with the pregnancy. But when friends publicly prayed for their baby to be healed, Beth admits that she struggled. 

Only God knows what is going on inside the womb

“I wasn’t asking God for healing. I was just asking God for the strength to bring life into the world, even for a few moments.”

Now, she remains sensitive to others who are walking through a valley – and is careful when praying for the miraculous. “If you’ve got a friend going through a hard time, meet them where they’re at,” she says. “Don’t express hope for something inconceivable if they don’t have faith for it themselves. Pray quietly for miracles. Too much positivity can be the opposite of what people need during their darkest times.” 

Christmas hope

Christmas presented one of the lowest and highest moments in Beth’s third pregnancy. Travelling six hours to stay with her in-laws, she spent Christmas Eve frantically packing and chasing after two pre-school children, then aged four and two. When she finally got into bed in the early hours of Christmas morning, Beth realised she hadn’t felt the baby move for some time. 

“I barely slept that night,” she recalls. “Having been told I could miscarry at any moment, I couldn’t decide whether to rush to hospital on Christmas Day or wait until another, slightly less precious moment to find out we had lost our baby.” It was an impossible situation. 

Despite the chaos in her mind, Beth attended the Christmas Day service at church. She stood silently through carols and listened to the hope-filled, bittersweet message of the Christ child’s birth, while wondering if her own would survive. “Suddenly, mid-sermon, I felt strong, clear movements,” she says. “I began to weep in my seat. We were together, as a family of five, celebrating the hope of Jesus. It was the most precious Christmas gift I have ever received.”

Friday night

As Beth’s due date drew closer, the family began to prepare. “We told the kids that our baby might not come home from hospital, but go to be with Jesus instead,” Beth recalls. She decided against a baby shower and purchased only a few essential newborn items. 

At the pre-op appointment on the Friday prior to her elected C-section, a scan revealed the baby’s heart rate was irregular. Beth’s placenta had started to fail. She was rushed into surgery. 

The couple had been told that their baby was unlikely to take a breath, let alone have the strength to make an audible cry. But baby Hope greeted the world with a gutsy scream when she arrived.

“Looking back, I can see God all over that Friday,” Beth says. “If I hadn’t had the extra scan, Hope would almost definitely have died over the weekend. He sustained us right until the final moment.” 

Hope weighed less than four pounds at birth, but her loud cry told the world she had a voice, a purpose and a future. And she was not only alive, but completely healthy. 

“Someone told me never to go into surgery on a Friday night – it’s the shift nobody wants, and things often go wrong,” Beth smiles. “But we had defied all the odds – and decided to carry on doing so right up until the end.”

Hope has a face – and a future

Now three and a half, Hope is the picture of health and vitality and has no ongoing medical needs. Later, doctors suggested that instead of Edwards’ syndrome, a rare condition known as confined placental mosaicism (CPM), which causes abnormal tissue in the placenta, could have been diagnosed during pregnancy – had additional screening been offered.

Hope was not ‘incompatible with life’ after all. The Appleby family chose to continue with their pregnancy – against medical advice – due to their deep Christian faith. Now, they share their story at every opportunity. 

“When I was pregnant, she was a theoretical person,” Beth says, recalling the vulnerable foetus whose life was threatened at every hurdle, but who formed perfectly for 37 weeks. “But now, Hope has a face. She is a real human being.”

Beth’s book seeks to share a personal story of good news, which she prays will lead others to find their own hope in Jesus. But she doesn’t deny the outcome could have been very different. 

“If Hope had died, I certainly wouldn’t have written a book,” she admits. “I suffered survivors’ guilt for quite some time. But Hope’s story matters because one mother might choose to continue with her pregnancy. I wish for all babies in the womb to be treated with the respect of a living person. And I hope our story will give others courage to tell theirs.” 

Carrying Hope by Beth Appleby (Instant Apostle) is out now