The UK Church cannot sideline the elderly. Here’s how one congregation is getting it right

A few weeks ago, The Independent reported on proposals by the Church of England to close a historic church with a predominantly elderly congregation, prompting accusations of ageism. Days later, Church Times ran a story about a priest being blocked from installing a lift and other accessibility adaptations because they would compromise the building’s “architectural significance.”

Is the Church sidelining older people?

Deprived of a suitable place to meet, older people in these communities are at risk of missing out on the blessings that come from joining together, be it hearing a sermon, singing hymns or catching up with friends over coffee. 

Sadly, in modern life the needs of older people are often ignored. Public toilets closed, bus routes scrapped, parking that can only be paid for via an app – such measures take their toll on those with ageing bodies, or who aren’t up to speed with the latest digital tech.

However, churches should be different. Places where “Grey hair is a crown of glory” (Proverbs 16:31) and the elderly are valued for their wisdom and cared for as their earthly tent grows weaker.

Connections

I’m pleased to say that I’ve seen churches rising to the challenge of responding to older people rightly. Earlier this month, I spent a morning at Holy Trinity Claygate in Surrey. Under the leadership of Pippa Cramer, Pastoral Care and Seniors Minister, each week the church opens its doors for Connections. 

Ushered through the doors by warm smiles and tea, coffee and cake, the 100-plus older people who attend this seniors’ gathering are instantly made to feel at home. The space is set with low tables and chairs, conducive to conversation. An array of activities is on offer, among them chair exercises, table tennis, hand massage and tabletop games. There’s also a food stall, a table offering tech support, and displays of special interest. 

Every week, there’s also a time of spiritual reflection, and it was for Connections that Pippa and her husband Steve developed Hymns We Love, a series to help older people explore faith through well-loved hymns.  

One lady who has been coming to Connections since it started in 2011 is Dorothea, 93. “Everyone here is so loving and caring,” she says. “I’ve made lots of new friends.” Another gentleman tells me that, thanks to Connections, he’s made more friends in Claygate over the past three years than he made living in Walton-on-Thames for the previous 30. 

There are also occasional visits from local nursery and primary schools, with everyone reaping the benefits of intergenerational connection. “It’s such a joy to have them coming along, helping with arts and crafts and singing too,” says Pippa. “Both generations just love it!” 

Through the community at Connections, many older people find the support they need to navigate the challenges that often attend later life – among them bereavement, loneliness, and diminishing health – and flourish in their faith, with some discovering the gospel for the very first time.

Older people aren’t just there to be ministered to; they also have much to contribute

At Pilgrims’ Friend Society, we also see churches dedicated to including the older people who live in our twelve care homes across England, many of whom have dementia. In Walton-on-the-Naze, a group of residents (or ‘family members’ as we call those who live with us) from Luff House regularly attends Homelands Free Church for its Friendship Friday. “Our family members love going out and meeting people in the community,” says Ruth Mockler, Activities and Community Engagement (ACE) Facilitator at the home. “There’s one lady who has been friends with another lady at Friendship Friday for over 50 years. They’ve been on that spiritual journey together, and so it’s a joy for them to be able to see each other.”

Another lady who lives at the home has advanced dementia but continues to go to her church, with a volunteer picking her up. “A lot of the time she can seem quite confused but when she goes to church she often prays out loud during the prayer time,” says Ruth. “It’s not just an important time for her – others are also encouraged by her prayers and faith.”

As the UK’s older population grows, the church has a responsibility to step up and embrace the older people in our midst. Whatever our age, we all have value and purpose in God’s sight. At Pilgrims’ Friend Society, we often point to Psalm 92:14, which testifies that God’s people will “bear fruit in old age” and “stay fresh and green”. Older people aren’t just there to be ministered to; they also have much to contribute.