Philippa Bolton missed her son’s Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) for many years. This ADHD awareness month, Philippa and her son, Isaac, share their advice for Christians with the diagnosis - and the churches that support them
Looking back, it should have been obvious that my son, Isaac, had ADHD on the day that he locked himself in the toilet, aged six, because he had just been told that it was a family service that morning, and not junior church as he had been expecting.
For him, this meant sitting still for an hour, excruciatingly bored. I don’t use the term ‘excruciating’ lightly. For someone with ADHD, sitting still can be almost physically painful. Thankfully, on that occasion, there were cool magic tricks and funny sketches, and it ended up being a highlight of his childhood church experience.
What does ADHD look like?
ADHD can take many forms. One person with ADHD is not the same as another, but symptoms can include difficulties with focus (hyper fixation, attention deficits and surpluses, impulsiveness) and challenges with routine. It’s also not uncommon for ADHD to co-exist with other forms of neurodiversity, such as autism, dyslexia or dyspraxia. Some people struggle more with attention, others with hyperactivity, some with both. But the important thing is this: it’s not a problem unless it’s a problem. For many people, it’s the thing that makes them really good at what they do.
The ‘AD’ stands for ‘attention deficit’. Having ADHD can mean differences in the way your attention works. This means you might struggle to concentrate for long periods and ‘zone out’ - or end up doing several things at once and not finishing any of them. You might get easily distracted, be disorganised, not get back to people or forget things. The flip side is ‘hyperfocus’ - short periods of intense focus that can be extremely productive or great in a crisis. For some people, this makes them really good at their jobs (think about the emergency services, for example).
Your relationship with God is unique, because you are unique
The ‘H’ is hyperactivity. Sitting still and being quiet can be really hard. Queues are your nemesis. You will fidget, want to move around and find any excuse to do so. You might be impulsive – taking risks for an adrenaline high. You might struggle with anger, not think things through or jump into situations with both feet. You might say yes to everything or regularly interrupt people. But you can also be energetic, provide the ideas and ‘get up and go’ for projects, or be the one who leads when everyone else is hesitating.
If you’re looking for an example of how ADHD can be both a challenge and a superpower, the disciple Peter might be a good place to start. Here’s a guy who jumps into lake Galilee when he sees Jesus (quickly regretting it), attempts to cut the ear off a soldier at Gethsemane and rushes into the tomb when the other disciple holds back.
No other disciple is described as behaving like Peter does. He impulsively says the wrong thing at the wrong time on many occasions throughout scripture! But he was also the person Jesus said he would build his Church upon, who stood up in front of thousands at Pentecost, who preached under intense persecution and died for his best friend and saviour. That energy - which people with ADHD often have in abundance - made him the very person that Jesus needed.
Advice for churches
So, thinking about how Jesus supported Peter is a good place to start thinking about how the Church can support Christians with ADHD.
Jesus was Peter’s mentor, in many ways – and regular mentoring has been really helpful for Isaac, too. But remember, you will need to chase your ADHD mentee, and do the organising. They might be late and forget to come. These things are all normal.
Mentoring is about supporting someone to develop as a Christian. Be curious, interested and help them explore what works for them. Prescriptive ways of praying, reading the Bible and spending time with God – such as the ‘Bible in a year’, quiet times or being still can be massively guilt inducing for someone who find all of those things really hard. Think creatively and encourage a range of different ways to connect with God. Isaac shares some great ideas in the next section.
It’s also about finding the right roles for them within the church and supporting them with things they might find hard. For example, if your mentee has a gift for youth work, make sure they are given help with organising events, keeping on top of admin, replying to text messages etc. It’s also OK to challenge in a loving way when things aren’t working well. Jesus did this with Peter – loving his enthusiasm but also curbing it when needed – think about the patient, persistent, exchange between them when Jesus washes Peter’s feet (see John 13):
Peter: “You’re going to wash my feet?!”
Jesus: “Yes, you don’t get it now, but you will.”
Peter: ”You will never wash my feet!”
Jesus: “Then you can’t share in what I have for you.”
Peter: “OK! Wash all of me then!”
Jesus: “You don’t need a bath, you’re already clean 😊.”
Finally, the church service. Think about the time each section takes. Can longer talks be made more interactive? Lengthy prayer sections can also be really challenging. Does God need lots of words or just the key points? The Lord’s prayer is concise, effective and covers all the bases!
But enough from me. Isaac has written some top tips that help give some insights into how Christians with ADHD can navigate their spiritual life, both for those with ADHD and the people who are walking with them on the journey.
Top tips from your friendly neighbourhood ADHD Christian
Isaac writes…
Christianity is something that I devote so much of my life to… when I remember about it! But with ADHD, maintaining a prayer routine is a nightmare - and sitting still through a sermon is even worse. However, because of my neurodiversity, I love getting involved in as much as possible (sometimes too much). This eagerness is a boon to churches and can inspire growth and drive among the community.
Despite this, the challenge to ‘fit in’ always seems to loom, but that’s not the point of this. The point is to adapt in your own way to the workings of the church, which will hopefully further your relationship with Christ.
I’ve written a list of helpful tips for Christians with ADHD – and thrown in some ideas for how the Church can make sure Christians with ADHD have a better time adapting to the format.
Prayer and Bible study
Set achievable goals. I use the Bible app verse of the day as a daily devotional. You can put it on your home screen, making it visible whenever you open your phone, so you don’t have to worry about remembering to read it.
Get yourself a Bible study buddy. This way, using the body doubling technique, you can have a weekly study session and discuss challenging verses. Set a time in your calendar, put on every reminder possible, and tell your friend to message you half an hour beforehand. We both know you will forget otherwise.
Short prayers are just as good. God knows you better than you know yourself. I get my words mixed up because I worry about what to say and how I’m saying it. I find it easier to cut straight to the point and keep it simple.
Relax in prayer. Random thoughts pop up all the time when I pray, which can be very discouraging. However, just relax, speak your prayers out loud so they aren’t in the messy spaghetti bowl of your thoughts, and don’t worry, God knows what you mean, always.
Worship and the word
Use the words to regain focus. During worship, I get distracted all the time by random word associations, the shape of the verse on the screen, or what the worship team is doing. All of this can shift my focus away, but by closing in on one word at a time, I am usually able to get back into it.
Body double with God. It sounds a bit strange to give an all-powerful, transcendent deity the same role as your study buddy. But God is there to help us in all ways, and reminding ourselves that he is always with us is a great way to stay on target.
Write it down. Take a notebook and during the sermon, make bullet points and draw images to help you focus on what the preacher is saying. You could put together a church bag, containing your Bible, notebook, pen and favourite fidget thingy that doesn’t make lots of noise. This way you can remember all your stuff for church and be better equipped to take in what is said.
Talk about it. Discussing the sermon afterwards can help your brain remember what was said. Think of it like a quick pop quiz to see how well you can recall the sermon.
Adapting the church
Have pens and paper at a welcome point for easy access.
Make a title for the sermon and have it displayed to ensure convenient note taking.
Create cell groups within the church to encourage the study buddy practise.
Have courses for deeper discussions of faith, like the Alpha course, for a stricter devotional routine.
Have weekly devotional goals, such as: “Read Romans 1-3 and think about God as, not a judge, but THE judge, as well as what God’s righteousness means”. This helps to create a focal point for the week.
Final focused thoughts (mostly)
Christianity is hard. It’s supposed to be. But that doesn’t mean it’s rigid. Your relationship with God is unique, because you are unique. I’ve always struggled to make my relationship reflect other peoples, to make it more ‘normal’. However, God made me with added neurospicy flavours, so learning how to mix my Christian life with ADHD is vital for my relationship with God to be honest and work.
Think of it like Lego. God made thousands of different Lego pieces that all fit together to make the Church but are also complementary to him. We need to recognise that trying to fit to God like someone else is not possible, but by figuring out our own connection, we can thrive in his blessing.
ADHD Awareness Month is taking place this October
For more on this subject, see ‘Rethinking disobedience when your child has ADHD’ on premiernexgen.com, where you can also access other resources on additional needs


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